Shocking Bears

For the last few days, this bear had been wandering a local neighborhood [which happens to be in our part of town, two miles down Dead Rd]. This is a relatively undeveloped area, with lots of woods still making their final stands before developers burn it down.

The bear reappeared today, and the cops were on the scene. They ended up shooting the bear with a taser gun, which killed it.

http://www.wftv.com/news/13901862/detail.html

What do they do in rural areas of America, where this is commonplace? Do they call the cops out to shoot a bear, because their kids have to play outside? Do they call Animal Control to move it somewhere "safe", as if it were by mistake it ended up where it did?

Is this acceptable treatment because you live in the sprawl of "Orlando", that bears are supposed to be rare? That bears must leave ASAP before we are forced to move it or kill it? Bears are only cute for so long, until they start affecting our American way of life, right? Put them in parks and zoos so we can watch them at our convenience. "Bears don't have to go to work and pay off debt! I have to take my 10-year-old son to football practice and my 8-year-old daughter to cheerleading practice. Isn't she cute in that cheerleading skirt? She will make a fine sexual object for high school jocks! Anyways, I don't have time to be trapped inside by a killer bear. Actually, when does bear-hunting season start? I want to supplement my 10-year-old son's football with some killing. I don't want him growing up some non-violent queer. Well, we better get going to church now..."

Back to bears. This isn't a grizzly bear, it isn't going to tear some child's throat out after a frustrating day of salmon-hunting. And what about the 4 people that were in the garage that the bear entered? The ones the cop decided he needed to "protect"? Were they really in danger at the hands of this small black bear?

I like how the story refers to it as a "small bear". Did you mean to say adolescent? Because I highly doubt this is the Muggsy Bogues of bears. And while sleuths of bears don't have geneologists to keep track of their heritage, they do have regional families and generations to go with. So while you may not kill off the species with this behavior, you may kill off a family line. Way to go, cops.
Is this where some guy in jean shorts starts talking about population management? This philosophy says we don't cut back on development. We just keep burning down the forests and building houses and strip malls. Orlando needs another AMSCOT. In the meantime, we have to kill a percentage of the animals that call these forests home because they get in our way. After all, God didn't know what he was doing when he gave animals penises and vaginas to have babies with. We must correct that mistake!

This makes me think of an idea that Jim Philips of 104.1 always speaks of, and that is baby liscenses. If we subject animals to this kind of population control...then maybe we should administer thorough tests to filter out unfit parents. If you aren't fit, you can't have babies. Of course, I don't believe in this because God has given all life the gift of reproduction [even if you still have Bush/Cheney '04 stickers on your SUVs]. And once that gift has been used, and when babies, puppies, and cubs aren't cute anymore...it doesn't mean you throw it out in the form of capital punishment, war, and food processing.
Oh! And alligator hunting season starts today! That is the next best thing to snake hunting season. The Palatka Snake Festival is always a blast. Snake-blood shots. Snake-dogs. Snake-burgers. Snake-hats. Snake-beer. Snake funnel cake.

I hate Orlando and can't wait to finish school so we can blow this joint.